New York former Mayor Mike Bloomberg continued flooding social media and TV with ads in hopes of votes months away on Super Tuesday. So far he's spent $500 million of his own money and has gotten nothing for it. Forget the presidency, Mike belongs in Congress with a record like that.
Senator Mitt Romney was ripped by Utah Republicans for being the lone Republican in either the House or Senate to vote Trump guilty of an impeachment charge. Poor Mitt can't seem to do anything right. He decided to have his I Am Spartacus moment Wednesday and it killed Kirk Douglas.
Nancy Pelosi was ripped for tearing up her copy of Trump's State of the Union speech behind his back Tuesday. Her act needs work. It'd have been a lot funnier if Nancy had ripped up Trump's speech into four sections like she did, then fold it up together and then re-opened an intact newspaper.
President Trump received bi-partisan applause in his State of the Union speech calling for an infrastructure bill to improve our roads and bridges. It would also fund badly needed upgrades in communication. It's 2020 and the people of Iowa are still waiting for the results of the Super Bowl.
The Iowa Caucus suffered a communications disaster Monday when caucuses across the state were unable to report their tallies. No one knew the vote totals for eighteen hours because the app didn't work and the phone lines jammed. Guess which presidential candidate suggested smoke signals.
Iowa election officials were as mortified as the candidates by the delay in reporting the caucus results until Tuesday afternoon. However with seventy-two percent of the votes tallied, Mayor Pete upset Bernie Sanders. These are the times we live in, Iowans chose homosexuality over socialism.
Joe Biden got angry with a crowd in New Hampshire after Iowa caucus results showed that Joe finished behind Bernie Sanders, Mayor Pete and Liz Warren. Biden finished fourth behind a communist, a gay man and a fake Indian. You'd be angry too if you'd just lost to the Village People.
The Iowa Caucus winner was finally able to be announced five days after everyone had left for New Hampshire. The results are still a bit mysterious. My guess is, someone accidentally replaced the voting app with the one for Netflix series and the winner of the Iowa caucus was Queen Elizabeth.
The London Sun says Murder She Wrote, the popular detective series that ran for twelve years in prime time on network television, is going to be brought back with a new cast. It's about how murder after murder follows a seventy-year-old woman wherever she goes. It will star Hillary Clinton.
The New Hampshire primary vote count ran into the night with Democratic Socialist Bernie Sanders in the lead. Bernie called for the nationwide legalization of marijuana, but he did not mention cocaine or heroin. Who knew Bernie was the conservative alternative to Democrats?
The Wall Street Journal says the Mormon Church has quietly amassed a one hundred billion dollar investment fund. The article didn't reveal the name of the investment broker who landed the Mormon investment fund. However if Mitt Romney has a son named Hunter, my money's on him.
The University of Delaware honored its alum Joe Biden by naming a building on campus after him called the Joe Biden Institute. For all of Joe's quirkiness he's a lovable guy. The Joe Biden Institute Building is four stories tall, and in Joe's honor, the elevator doesn't go all the way to the top.
Front Porch Punditry
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Mon Feb 24, 2020 6:12 am
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Front Porch Punditry
