The Husband Store

A store that sells new husbands opened in Melbourne where women can choose a husband. Instructions at the entrance explain how the store operates: You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors, and the value of the products increase as you ascend. You may choose any item from a particular floor or go up to the next floor but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!

So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor the sign reads: Floor 1 – These men Have Jobs.

She is intrigued, but continues to the second floor, where the sign reads: Floor 2 – These men Have Jobs and Love Kids.

‘That’s nice,’ she thinks, ‘but I want more.’ So she continues upward. The third floor sign reads: Floor 3 – These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, and are Good Looking.

‘‘Wow,’ she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going. She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads: Floor 4 – These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Really Good Looking, and Help With Housework.

‘Oh, mercy me!’ she exclaims, ‘I can hardly stand it!’ Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads: Floor 5 – These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, Help with Housework, and Have a Strong Romantic Streak.

She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor, where the sign reads: Floor 6 – You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This empty floor demonstrates that women are impossible to please and always want more. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.

To avoid gender-bias charges, the store’s owner opened a New Wives Store across the street. The first floor has wives that love sex. Wives on the second floor love sex, have money, and like beer. The third, fourth, fifth, and sixth floors have never been visited.