#1 Man Arrested for Stabbing Watermelon by Eglman 15.07.2014 18:16


Now that we know that plants don’t like to be eaten, we can assume that they don’t like getting stabbed either. Fortunately Big Government is there to protect the rights of fruits and vegetables:

The Register Citizen of Torrington reports Carmine Cervellino of Thomaston was arraigned Monday on charges of threatening and disorderly conduct. He was released after posting a $500 bond.

Police say [an unnamed] woman had gone to police on July 4 to report finding drugs, including marijuana, in Cervellino’s tool box. He was not arrested.

They say she later returned home to find the watermelon on the counter with a butcher’s knife in it. She reported that Cervellino then entered the room and began carving the watermelon. She called the incident passive-aggressive and menacing.

Incidents like this are especially menacing for those who happen to be watermelons.

Government must stop the carnage.


#2 RE: Man Arrested for Stabbing Watermelon by PzLdr 16.07.2014 00:10


Hate Crime?

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